Welcome to the Kaylee Frye quote database! This page will have a list of all the quotes Kaylee says, along with that which is said before it and during it. (Sometimes Kaylee says something, Mal says something, Wash says something, and then Kaylee says something again. I'll be including all of these quotes, not just her quotes) So read on to see what Kaylee says in Firefly and, eventually, Serenity. Click here to go back to the Kaylee Frye page.
All of Kaylee's quotes are in Bold text.
January 26th, 2006: Decided to come back here. I'll be securing more quotes and should have Shindig quotes up.
November 17th, 2005: Added Bushwhacked to the list.
[[after an Alliance Patrol spots Serenity]]
Wash: Kaylee, go to blackout. We're being buzzed.
Kaylee: Shr ah. (Affirmative) Goin' dark.
[turns off power]
Kaylee: Okay, now I can't get down.
[[referring to Alliance Patrol, after getting crates]]
Jayne: What the hell are they doin' out this far, anyhow?
Kaylee: Shining the light of civilization.
[[after Wash and Zoe head up to the Bridge]]
Mal: Alright. Let's get these crates stowed. I don't want any tourists stumblin' over them.
Kaylee: We're taking on passenger’s at Persephone?
Mal: That's the notion. Could use a little respectability on the way to Boros.
[removes hidden hatch]
Mal: Not to mention the money.
Jayne: Pain in the a$$.
Kaylee: No, it's shiny. I like to meet new people. They've all got stories.
Jayne: Captain, can you stop her from bein' cheerful, please?
Mal: I don't belive there's a power in the 'verse can stop Kaylee from bein' cheerful. Sometimes you just want to duct tape her mouth and dump her in the hold for a month.
[Kaylee kisses Mal's cheek]
Kaylee: I love my captain.
[[after landing on Persephone]]
Mal: This shouldn't take too long. Put us down for departue in about three hours.
[turns to Wash]
Mal: Grab any supplies we're low on, fuel her up.
Kaylee: I'd sure love to find a brand-new compression coil for the steamer.
Mal: Yes, and I'd like to be the king of all Londinum and wear a shiny hat. Just get us some passengers. Them as can pay. All right? Kaylee: The compression coil busts, we're drifting.
Mal: Best not bust then.
[[Kaylee talking to Book]]
Kaylee: You're gonna come with us.
Book: Excuse me?
Kaylee: You like ships. You don't seem to be looking at the destinations. What you care about is the ships, and mine's the nicest.
Book: She don't look like much.
Kaylee: Oh, she'll fool ya. You ever sail in a Firefly?
Book: Long before you were crawling. Not an aught-three though. Didn't have the extenders. Tended to shake.
[Kaylee stands up and comes over to Book]
Kaylee: So, uh, how come you don't care where you're goin'?
Book: 'Cause how you get there is the worthier part.
Kaylee: Are you a missionary?
Book: I guess. I'm a shepherd from the Southdown Abbey. Book. I'm called Book.
[Kaylee and Book shake hands]
Book: Been out of the world for a spell-- like to walk it a while. Maybe bring the Word to them as need it told.
Kaylee: Well, I'm Kaylee. And this here's Serenity, and she's the smoothest ride from here to Boros for anyone can pay...Can you pay or--
Book: Well, I got a little cash and, uh--
[reaches down and grabs small box]
Kaylee: Ooh. Grandpa.
Book: I never married.
Kaylee: Welcome aboard, Mr.--
[Wash drives mule with container onto Serenity]
Simon: Please be careful with that.
Kaylee: Mal, this is Simon. Simon, this is our captain.
Simon: [nods head] Captain Reynolds.
Mal: Welcome aboard.
[walks past Kaylee]
Mal: This all we got?
[Kaylee nods, turns to Simon, and nods again]
Zoe: We got a full house, Captain.
Mal: Kaylee, I'm lockin' it up.
Kaylee: All aboard.
[[In dining area]]
Mal: Meals are taken up here in the dining area. Kitchen's pretty much self-explanitory. You're welcome to eat what there is any time. What there is is pretty much standard fare-- protien in all the colors of the rainbow. We do have sit-down meals-- next one being at about 1800.
Kaylee: I think Shepherd Book has offered to help me prepare something.
Mal: You're a Shepherd?
Book: I thought the outfit gave it away. Is it a problem?
Kaylee: Of course not. It's not a problem 'cause it's not.
[[Book meeting Inara]]
Mal: Ah, the ambassador graces us with her presence.
Inara: Hello, Mal. I see we have some new faces.
Kaylee: Hey, you.
Inara: Hey, you.
Mal: Ambassador, this is Shepherd Book.
Inara: I'd have to say this is the first time we've had a preacher on board.
Book: Well, I wasn't expecting to see a state official, either. Ambassador.
[Book bends down to kiss Inara's hand, but is cut short by Mal's chuckling]
Book: I'm missing something funny.
Kaylee: Not so funny.
Inara: Ambassador is Mal's way of saying--
Mal: She's a wh ore, Shepherd.
Kaylee: The term is "Companion".
Mal: I always get those mixed up. How's buisness?
Inara: None of yours.
Mal: She is pretty much our ambassador. There's plenty of planets wouldn't let you dock without a decent Companion on board. This-- This isn't a problem for you, is it, Shepherd?
Book: Well, I-- I certainly--
Inara: It's all right. I mostly keep to myself. When I'm not whoring.
Mal: Don't you want to meet the rest of the bunch?
Inara: Why don't you make sure they want to meet me first?
[Inara and Kaylee go up the stairs]
Kaylee: So how many fell madly in love with you and wanted to take you away from all this?
Inara: Just the one. I think I'm slipping.
Kaylee: You're a doctor, right?
Simon: Oh, uh, yes. I was a trauma surgeon on Osiris in Capital City.
Mal: Long way from here.
Kaylee: You seem so young to be a doctor.
Simon: Yeah. You're pretty young to be ship's mechanic.
Kaylee: Know how. Machines just got workings, and they talk to me.
Book: That's a rare gift.
Kaylee: Well, not like being a doctor. Helping fix people-- that's important.
Jayne: Little Kaylee here just wishes you was a gynecologist. [laughs]
[Everyone stops smiling, and eating]
Mal: Jayne, you will keep a civil tongue in that mouth, or I will sew it shut. Is there an understanding between us?
Jayne: You don't pay me to talk pretty. Just because Kaylee gets lubed up over some big-city dandy--
Mal: Walk away from this table. Right now.
[Jayne collects food and leaves]
Simon: What do you pay him for?
Simon: I was just wondering what his job is-- on the ship?
Mal: Public relations.
[[Kaylee is shot!]]
[at the point of the ruccuss, Kaylee comes from the infirmary]
Kaylee: What is--
Book: Stop it!
[Mal and Simon run to Kaylee, Book beats up Lawman]
Simon: How do you feel?
Kaylee: A little odd.
Simon: Be still. Be still.
[Jayne walks up to Book and Lawman]
Jayne: Out of the way.
Book: You're not this man.
Jayne: Not right away.
Book: He's no threat.
Kaylee: Why did he--
[Simon opens up Kaylee's jumpsuit to reveal bullet hole]
Mal: Oh, wow. That ain't hardly a mosquito bite.
Kaylee: Big mosquito.
Book: Not gonna happen.
[Jayne co cks g un]
Jayne: I ain't jokin', Preacher.
[Zoe co cks Shotgun]
Zoe: Just tie him up. Do it.
Simon: Kaylee, stay with me. Stay with me. Can you move your feet?
Kaylee: Are you asking me to dance?
Simon: She's going into shock.
Inara: Kaylee. Mei-mei you have to focus.
Zoe: The g un, Shepherd. Please.
[Kaylee screams in pain]
Simon: The infirmary working?
Mal: Yeah, we got it stocked.
Wash over P.A.: Captian, we've been hailed by a cruiser-- ordered to stay on course and dock for prisoner transfer.
[Simon stands up]
Simon: Change course. Run.
Mal: Hell with you. You brought this down on us. I'm dumpin' you with the law.
Simon: She's dying.
Mal: You're not gonna let her.
Simon: Yes, I am.
Mal: No, you can't.
Zoe: No way the feds'll let us walk.
Mal: Then we dump him in a shuttle and leave him.
Kaylee: Everybody's so mad.
Inara: It's ok.
Kaylee has no lines in Act 3.
[[Kaylee wakes up]]
Kaylee: Hey, Captain.
Mal: Hey. Hello Kaylee, what's the news?
Kaylee: I'm shiny, Captain. A-OK. I can't feel much below me belly, though. It's gettin' cold.
Mal: Well, you just gotta rest. Something's gonna break down on this boat real soon. Who else I got to fix it?
[Mal grabs army blanket and puts it over her]
Kaylee: Well, don't you worry none. Doc fixed me up pretty. He's nice.
Mal: Don't go workin' too hard on that crush, mei-mei. Doc won't be with us for long.
Kaylee: You're nice too.
Mal: No I'm not. I'm a mean old man.
Kaylee: He wasn't gonna let me die. He was just tryin' to-- It's nobody's fault.
[Kaylee grabs Mal's hand]
Kaylee: Okay. Just promise me you're gonna remember that.
Mal: I'll keep it in mind.
Kaylee: You are a nice man, Captain. You're always lookin' after us. You just gotta have faith in people.
[Kaylee looks over and sees River]
Kaylee: She's a real beauty, isn't she?
[Kaylee falls asleep]
[River gets up]
Kaylee: What's wrong, sweetie?
Kaylee over P.A.: He took her. [Groans] He took River.
Wash over P.A.: Kaylee, how we doin'? Gonna need a little push here.
Kaylee: You want me to go for full burn?
Wash over P.A.: Not just yet, but set it up.
Kaylee: You know where the press regulator is?
[Book finds his way to it]
Kaylee: Head of the class. [cough]
Kaylee over P.A.: We're ready for full burn on your mark.
Zoe: Full burn in atmo? That won't cause a blowback, burn us out?
Mal: Even if it doesn't, they can push just as hard, keep right on us. Wash, you gotta give me an Ivan.
Wash: I'll see what I can do. Kaylee. How would you feel about pullin' a Crazy Ivan?
Kaylee: Always wanted to try one. Jayne, open the port jack control, cut the hydraulics.
[Jayne walks in opposite direction]
Jayne: Where the hell is--
Kaylee: Look! Look! Look where I'm pointing.
[Jayne opens the port jack control, to reveal a lot of wires]
Kaylee: Now it's real simple.
[Jayne gives look]
Zoe: They're on to us.
Mal: Come on, come on, come on, come on.
Kaylee over P.A.: Okay.
Wash: Everybody hold on to something.
[Everyone grabs something]
Wash: Here's something you can't do.
[Pulls Crazy Ivan]
Kaylee: That's my g irl. That's my good g irl.
The Train Job
[[on bridge, after Wash threatens to "blow a new crater in this little moon"]]
Mal: My thanks, Wash. Nice save, as always.
Wash: A pleasure.
Mal: And how are our passengers?
Kaylee: They're fine. So, what happened? Another terrible brawl?
Zoe: Oddly enough, there was.
[Inara is brushing Kaylee's hair]
Inara: Do you want me to put it up?
Kaylee: No, that's okay.
Inara: You have such lovely hair. I'm sure the doctor would agree.
Kaylee: Who? Simon? No, he's much too-- I mean, I'm just-- Do you think it looks better up?
Inara: [laughs] We can experiment. We may even get wild later and wash your face.
Kaylee: You ever do this for your clients?
Inara: Very occasionally. Not all of them have enough hair to get a brush through.
Kaylee: Have you ever had to service a really hideous client with boils and the like?
Inara: A Companion chooses her own clients. That's guild law. But physical apperance doesn't matter so terribly. You look for compatibility of spirit. There's an energy about a person that's difficult to hide. You try to feel that--
[Mal walks into the room]
Mal: And then you try to feel the energy of their credit account. It has a sort of aura.
Inara: What did I say to you about barging into my shuttle?
Mal: That it was manly and impulsive?
Inara: Yes, precisely. Only the exact phrase I used was "don't."
Mal: Well you're holdin' my mechanic in thrall, and Kaylee, what the hell's going on in the engine room? Were there monkeys? Some terrifying space monkeys maybe got loose?
Kaylee: I had to rewire the grav thrust because somebody won't replace that crappy compression coil.
Mal: Well, get the place squared away. It's dangerous in there and I ain't payin' you to get your hair played at.
Kaylee: Kuh-ooh duh lao bao-jurn... (Horrible old tyrant...)
Mal: We work before we play.
[[Kaylee is preparing for Trian Heist in Cargo Bay]]
[Simon walks in]
Kaylee: Oh. Hey, Doctor.
Simon: You really should just call me Simon.
Kaylee: Oh, I'll do that then.
Simon: So, what are we doing?
Kaylee: Oh, crime.
Simon: Crime? Good. Okay. Crime.
Kaylee: It's a train heist. See we fly over the train car. The captain and Zoe sneak in. We lower Jayne onto the car and they bundle up the booty and we haul 'em all back up. Easy as lyin'.
Simon: So, you've done this before?
Kaylee: [laughs] Oh hell no! [serious] But I think it's gonna work. The captain is jen duh sh tyen tsai (an absolute genius) when it comes to plans.
Simon: Uh, is-- You know, is there anything I can-- Something I should be doing?
[Jayne walks in]
Jayne: Staying the hell out of everyone's way.
Kaylee: There's no call to be snappy, Jayne.
Jayne: Are you about to jump onto a moving train? Captain ain't around. I'm in charge.
Kaylee: Since when?
Jayne: And just 'cause Mal says you're medic don't make you part of the crew. You just play at figurin' what's wrong with that moon-brian sister of yours till we call for you. Dong ma? (Understand)
[Simon walks out of Bay]
Kaylee: You shouldn't be so rude to him.
Jayne: Why? 'Cause he's all rich and "fancible"?
Kaylee: He's not rich. The Alliance crashed his accounts when he snuck out his sister.
Jayne: Yeah, well, we could all be rich if we handed her back.
Kaylee: You're not even thinking that.
Jayne: Mal is.
Kaylee: That's not funny.
Jayne: He ain't stupid. Why would he take on trouble like those two if there weren't no profit in it, hmm? Captain's got a move he ain't made yet. You'll see.
[Jayne puts on hat]
Jayne: Time for some thrilling heroics.
[[after Jayne comes back with the loot]]
Jayne: Aah! God!
Kaylee: Where are the others?
Jayne: They shot my gorram leg!
Kaylee: Jayne. Are they still on the train? Are they gonna be okay?
Jayne: These are stone killers, little man. They ain't cuddly like me.
Wash: I'm not flying anywhere without my wife.
Kaylee: She'll be okay. She's with the captain.
Jayne: There. You see? Everybody wins. Aaah! Doc, I need a pop to quiet this pain some.
Jayne: That's it! We've waited long enough. Let's get this bird in the air.
Wash: No rutting way.
Simon: You really should sit down.
Kaylee: We can't just leave the captain and Zoe.
Jayne: They ain't comin', we can't walk in there and get 'em, so they're done. Let's fire it up.
Inara: What's going on?
Jayne: Strap in, we're taking off.
Wash: We're not!
Jayne: Captain would do the same if it were one of us.
Kaylee: Not in a million years!
Jayne: Shut it.
Wash: Listen to me.
Jayne: You know what the chain of command is? It's the chain I go get and beat you with until you understand who's in ruttin' charge here. Now we're finishing this deal and then maybe, maybe we'll come back for those morons who got themselves caught. You can't change that by getting all...[heavy breathing] Bendy.
Wash: All what?
Jayne: You got the-- The light from the console... To keep you-- Lift you up. [chuckles] Oh, they shine like...[attempts to grab light] Little angels. [falls asleep]
Wash: Did he just go crazy and fall asleep?
Simon: I told him to sit down.
Kaylee: You doped him.
Simon: It was supposed to kick in a good deal sooner. I-- I just didn't feel comfortable with him in charge. I hope that's all right.
Book: So, how do we get the others?
Wash: Jayne was right about them not making contact. Chances are they got pinched gettin' off that train.
Kaylee: We can't just waltz in and pull 'em out.
Book: Someone respectable enough might be able to.
[[Cargo Bay, after Inara rescues Mal and Zoe]]
Kaylee: Hey, how'd it go?
Mal: She hit me.
[Everyone walks down the stairs, revealing Jayne laying against the railing]
Kaylee: We tried to get him to the infirmary, he's just...Heavy.
Kaylee has no lines in Act 4.
[[after Wash gets back to work]]
Kaylee: That makes us one man short.
Jayne: Little Kaylee's always one man short.
(Kaylee punches Jayne on arm)
Jayne: Ow! Hey!
Kaylee: Say, Doc, why don't you come on down, play for our side. Inara won't mind.
[[back from break]]
Mal: So what do we figure? Transport ship?
Wash: Converted cargo hauler. Maybe a short-rance scow.
Kaylee: You can see she don't wanna be parked like that. The port thrust's gone, and that's what's makin' her spin the way she is.
[[on other ship's bridge]]
(Kaylee takes off Simon's mask)
Mal: Um, what are you doing here? And what's with the suit?
Simon: You're hilarious. .
Mal: All right, enough. Ain't got time for games. As long as you're here, you may as well lend a hand. You can roll with Kaylee. Let's be quick about this, people, all right? A few loads each. No need to be greedy.
Simon: Where are all the people?
Mal: Ship says lifeboat launched more than a week ago. We're gonna assume everyone got off okay. Anyway, we're just here to pick the bones. You two start in the engine room. Jayne, you take the galley.
Kaylee: You, um, have this on wrong.
[[in other ship's engine room]]
Simon: Aren't you the least bit curious?
Kaylee: About what?
Simon: Well, what happened here. I mean, why would anybody abandon their ship in the middle of nowhere like this?
Kaylee: For all sorts of reasons. Just not mechanical.
Kaylee: There ain't nothin' wrong with this. Not that I can see, anyhow.
Kaylee: Woo! (chuckles) Well there's a good one. (Grunts) Hold the bag open.
Wash: Captain? Captain. (gunshot) Zoe!
Zoe: Came from above, sir.
Mal: The galley.
Kaylee: We heard shootin'.
Simon: River, what are you--
River: I followed the voices.
Simon: Don't ever leave the ship. Not ever.
Mal: Handle her, will you, son?
Inara: I wonder how long he'd been living like that.
Kaylee: Don't know. He must have been real brave to survive like that when nobody else did.
Jayne: (sniffs) Yeah. Real hero, killin' all them people.
Kaylee: What? No, we don't believe that. We don't, do we?
Zoe: Captain wouldn't have brought him on board, were that the case.
Kaylee: So? How's our paitent?
Simon: Uh, aside from borderline malnutrition he's in remarkably good health.
Book: So he'll live, then?
Mal: Which, to my mind, is unfortunate.
Book: Not a very charitable attitude, Captain.
Mal: Charity'd be puttin' a bullet in his brainpan.
Mal: It'd save him the suffering. (Closes infirmary) All right. No one goes in here. Nothing more we can do for him now, not after what he's seen.
Simon: What do you mean?
Mal: That ship was hit by reavers.
[[in dining hall]]
Inara: Mal, how can you know?
Jayne: He don't. That's now. No way. It was that other fella, the one we run into. Like I said before, he went stir crazy, killed the rest, then took a walk in space.
Kaylee: Just a second ago you said--
Jayne: Don't matter what I said. Wasn't reavers. Reavers don't leave no survivors.
Mal: Strictly speaking, I wouldn't say they did.
[[in dining hall]]
Mal: I ain't sayin' there's any peace to be had, but on the off chance that there is, the folks deserve a bit of it.
Inara: Just when I think I have you figured out.
Kaylee: That was real pretty, Captain. What you just said.
Wash: Didn't think you were one for rituals and such.
Mal: I'm not. But I figure it'll keep the others busy for a while. No reason to concern them with what's to be done.
Mal: It's a real burden, being right so often.
Wash: What is that?
Mal: Boo by trap. Reavers sometimes leave 'em for the rescue ships. Triggered it when we latched on.
Wash: And when we detach?
Mal: It blows.
Wash: Okay, so we don't detach. We just, I don't know, sit tight until--
Zoe: What, reavers come back?
Kaylee: Looks like they've jerry-rigged it with a pressure catch. It's the only thing that'd work with all these spare parts. We could probably bypass that easy, we get to the D.C. line.
Mal: You tell me right now, little Kaylee. You really think you can do this?
Kaylee: Sure, yeah. I think so. Besides, if I mess up, it's not like you'll be able to yell at me.
Wash: (Nervous chuckle)
[[in cargo bay]]
Jayne: (Grunts) What's goin' on?
Mal: Well, right at this particular moment, I have to say, not a thing. Right?
Kaylee: Not a gorram thing.
Jayne: Looked like a thing to me.
[[in cargo bay]]
Commander: I want every inch of this junker tossed.
Mal: Settle down, Kaylee.
Kaylee: But Captain, did you hear what that purple-belly called Serenity?
Mal: Shut up!
[[on alliance ship]]
Kaylee: Six gerstlers crammed under every cooling drive so that you strain your primary atery function and you end up having to recycle secondary exhaust through a bypass system just so's you don't end up pumpin' it through the main atmofeed and asphyxiating the entire crew. Now that's junk.
Kaylee has no lines in Act 4.